How weird is this?

So Mandy has an interesting habit…

Ok, hear me out: I want to share with you one of the ways I’m getting to know Mandy, but it's gonna get a little weird. Can you hang? 

Let’s find out.

Working with my trainer, Farah DeJohnette, has helped me to really deepen my ability to listen to horses. If I’m being honest, I think I’ve always had this ability but being focused on “doing” and outward goals would get in the way. Farah has helped me get back to being with them– and just in time, because this is what Mandy needs.

Mandy communicates with us in a number of ways. As we are getting to  know her, her messages are becoming more and more clear.

She uses her facial expressions, movement, and her body to let us know what she likes and doesn’t like (we talked about this before–Reciprocal Vulnerability). 

Ok, so here’s the “weird" story.

When we met Mandy, we were told that she has tightness in her haunches (her rear end) and that she likes massage to help relax the muscles there. 

Now, me and Nicole are not formally trained in equine massage so we have been practicing what her former owners taught us and also going by instinct. 

What we have found is that Mandy’s typical way of greeting us is to walk up to us and immediately swing her tush around towards us and stand waiting for her booty-massage (this is not even the weird part).

This can be a little scary at first because normally when a horse swings their haunches at you, they are getting ready to kick.

Not Mandy.

She wants a nice butt rub. 

So we have been obliging while also practicing our own boundary setting– so she doesn’t swing and knock us over 😅

A couple of weeks ago, I went into Mandy’s paddock and sat on a stump. She came over and did her thing and swung her bum at me. I was ready for it and created the space I needed to feel comfortable.

I then put my hand out slowly and watched her watching me. I stopped my hand close to her haunches before touching her, when I saw her slightly lift her head and widen her eye. That told me that she could already feel my hand, even without direct touch.

I stayed there and imagined energy flowing. When it felt right, I touched her where I felt it was needed and immediately had an intense image come to my mind. 

I saw a tight rope around Mandy’s haunches that looped around her body pulling her forward.
I felt stress, fear, and surprise.

I continued with an intuitive massage and later became curious about this image.

Now for the real weird part:

Did Mandy show me a part of her trauma? 
Was what I saw in that image something she actually experienced?

During her roundup, when she and her herd were captured from the wild, or during her time at auction when she was “feral”, or during the time when she was being “broken” in traditional horse training ways, did they use a rope to pull her and did that cause trauma that she is now holding in her body?

I can only be curious, trust, and follow what I receive from her. 

I know Farah will tell me to go with it.

I can also tell you that since then, I have felt a much stronger connection with Mandy. I feel like that happened in a moment embedded in our trust-building process and that she showed me this when she was ready to do so. Since then, I feel that communication between us is more clear. She follows me around her paddock and engages in play much more readily.

So, what do you think: weird or not?

I’ll tell you that I think most people are able to communicate nonverbally across species much better than we assume but that it takes a lot of unlearning to be able to do so. 

Personally, it is also part of my own process of decolonization. A stripping away of perfectionism, urgency, the belief that there is only one right way, a prioritization of “the written word” (aka that only documentable research is valid), and many more aspects of the culture of white supremacy. 

I believe that we are capable of so much more than what our dominant society tells us and I believe that the liberated world that we are calling in needs us embodying that capability.

That is at the heart of our work at Stable Grounds Sanctuary

So come dare to get weird with us. 

We will be sending out emails more frequently between now and May 1 & 2 when the Great Give begins. 

Preview our Great Give Profile Here and save the link so you are ready on the Giving Days.

We hope that you find the coming emails both entertaining and enjoyable– and that they inspire you to join our Sanctuary of Stewards with a gift through the Great Give.

Our profile is live now and donations can be accepted beginning April 26 with the big donation drive days being May 1 & 2.

All Our Love,
Rebecca and the SGS Team